Of Happiness and Valiums

Chronicling my strife with the universe.

Special 2008 Loser Feature: Round #1

with 6 comments

Before I start off with that, let me elucidate a particular fact to the masses (by the masses I mean the insignificant, almost non-existent amount of readers I somehow miraculously get). There’s a reason why I’ve only told the existence to this blog to very few people and them I regard my closest friends. There’s also another reason why, regardless of how partial I am to them, I do not inform it to any UiTM friends.

Obviously, I’m afraid they might get insulted as it may seem that what I write about implicates them. The original purpose of this blog was, after all, to chronicle my days in UiTM and the frustration I experience from having to adapt to extreme changes in environment. One that I’m not particularly fond of.

That is why I was blown away when DJ found out about this blog (And I even mentioned her before! Remember the classmates post?)! Malu malu.

I’m quite at a loss as to how she found out, that clever girl. Though it’s extensively lucky that she happens to be among the few that have immunity in my books (No DJ, I’m not kissing your ass because you found out about my blog and now hold the tools to my complete social annihilation. It’s because you’re like the prettiest girl in the world ever oh hey would you like a cup of tea? Or my soul? You can have my soul will that please you?).

In all seriousness though, DJ, and friends like ‘Iffah, Hanisah, Izyan, Izzati, Ijai, Fatin, Farah, Mirah, Farahin and some others have actually been crucial in helping me maintain sanity. Thank you for that.

Back to the point, if you have UiTM friends, any of you, never mention my blog.

Never.

Otherwise you wouldn’t be getting these anymore:

Special 2008 Loser Eccentric-ish Person Feature: Round #1

Ismail Ibnu Arsad

I know his full name because he requested to be my friend on Friendster. As I’ve known him for a full semester now, and that he’s a classmate for two of my classes in addition to being on good terms with a lot of my good friends, it was of course very natural that… I rejected his request.

But hey, nothing to despair about. Now I can use his friendster profile to ridicule him. Yay!

I begin taking notice of this guy when one day, for god-knows-what reason, I was actually reading a text book! During class! My god the inter-stellar planets must have been misaligned then. Anyhoo, a huger anomaly was obvious aside from my sudden interest in pretending to read so it’s the first thing the lecturer sees when she comes in err I mean from my sudden inspiration to better myself as a student ah fuck I’ll shut up now. I looked up for one moment and a huge-ass, queen of hearts belt buckle that was gleaming silver so much that it made my eyes hurt was staring me in the face. If you think that’s weird, when I continually looked up, it belonged to a guy wearing a light dress shirt adorned with dark-toned embroideries of dancing dragons. And to top it all off; a fedora hat. Reminded me strongly of Johnny Depp’s fashion faux pas.

And sometimes, though not then, he would wear sunglasses similar to Johnny’s here except it’s the cheap, Petaling Street, RM10.95 knock-off version. In other words, he was exactly like Johnny Depp, minus the glasses, good looks, sense of style and really, really sexy eyes.

*Takes 15 minutes break Googling Johnny Depp’s pictures*

Okay. Okay. Was slightly distracted. Now back on course… Oh hey I’m drooling. :D~~~~~

…Okay. So. Huge-ass blinding belt buckle showcasing the queen of hearts;

Check.

Black fedora hat during class;

Check.

Tacky black shirt with obvious embroidered dragons;

Check.

Yup. We got a weirdo. Wanna see him?

Ta-da! Due to politeness, I tried my best to find the most normal-looking picture of him.

But of course, you have to see the fedora.

……..

I’m sorry, there’s no explanation for this one. I just couldn’t help myself.

Happily, let me now deliver the coup de grâce to this mardi gras live exhibit’s short-lived fame…

…He is a self-proclaimed magician.

Which explains the theme behind his belt buckle. Can you be more obvious?

I first realised his magician-y self when I was sitting a row behind him during T6 (I mention T6 and not ‘class’ or ‘a lecture’ because it makes me sound student-ish and impressive. Is it working?) He was playing with cards under the desk, swiftly handling it and practicing his legerdemain skills.

Or so he makes us think.

I think it was somewhat obvious, from that position he was sitting in while playing the cards, that he wanted to show-off to the row behind him – all of us girls by the way – his ‘1337’ card skillz. Come on dude. You were sitting on the far right. Your chair and yourself was turned slightly to the left, and you were leaning all the way back, giving us a completely clean view. So…

Yup. We got an idiot.

Of course, there were subtler ways in which he showed off his skills. Like performing magic tricks smack dab in the middle of a full class while making rancorous noises.

I swear, it’s like he’s trying to hide his talent from us!

His outfit on that particular day wasn’t a one-off showcase of extreme social retardation, he’s actually worn gaudier and louder attires. I’m actually more amazed by his ability to find these articles of clothing moreso than his magic.

I don’t want to continue my tirade of ridicule since I do believe in karma (and also I’m hungry). But, I do have to confess that he does have talent. If it weren’t for him becoming a slave to extremely retarded fashion, I might be piqued enough to ask the unfathomable, unexplored and fascinating secrets that he, as a magician, holds; i.e. where DID he buy those bizarre shirts?!

To redeem myself and make me appear less of an insulting, sarcastic and insensitive person (I want people to see me as bubbly and optimistic. Just you wait, people. I shall have rainbows and ponies streaming out of my ass. Just you wait!), here are a few pictures to impress. I don’t think any camera tricks are involved since like I said, he does seem to have talent.

Last but not least, here he is. The talented magician of 2008’s CAT, in all his glory!

I almost cried at how pathetic this picture is Isn’t he impressive?

Future post would definitely be my roommates. Now these guys you can’t miss.

Written by aziemah

May 21, 2008 at 3:53 pm

Posted in CAT/ACCA

Tagged with , ,

6 Responses

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  1. Ahaks.. Hye gurlz… tak ramai yg jumpa blog u kan.. tapi bagi kaki-kaki blog senang kot nak jumpa.. huhu… owh, sempat lagi ngumpat pasal I ek?? ahaks… nanti ler I ngumpat u semula dalam my blog.. huhu… Anywhere.. thanks.. daa..

    Ismail

    May 25, 2008 at 6:48 am

  2. […] I didn’t expect this in response to this. […]

  3. yeargh! Ismail, u can do it, man!
    Hahaha, suka tengok drama kamu berdua di dunia blog masing-masing. :)

    alifstyle

    May 29, 2008 at 6:17 am

  4. remember when we were in d lab together? n you checked your blog? thats when i memorised the url. ;P

    i read d magician’s post abt you which is really unexpected because there were rumours of him and someone else wasn’t it. n wth he took our pics but cut off my face! im so offended! hmph!

    dyjae

    June 12, 2008 at 2:11 am

  5. Ohh.. so THAT’S how. I guess it was my own carelessness. But damn you’re sneaky! And hot! …Remember to have me be the first person you inform when you’re single. *cough* >.>

    I wouldn’t know anything about any rumour… The only thing I notice about the loser is his gaudy look-at-me-i-need-constant-attention clothes. I used to think the lala culture was bad… ’till this.

    (Don’t worry about that picture… I keep an original in my computer… and it shall always be near my heart… cheeeeewah!)

    aziemah

    June 12, 2008 at 8:58 am

  6. yea, it seemed interesting when u checked it in the lab, so naturally, i have to check it out! oh yeah there were rumours of him n our beloved class rep. or maybe she’s the one yg perasan he likes her? heh.

    dyjae

    June 13, 2008 at 2:12 pm


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